lol if so I like you all a lot less. And have no care for your thoughts about me.


Alas, poor Dudley do Ride! I knew him, LickaU: a fellow
of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath
borne me on his back a thousand times; and now, how
abhorred in my imagination it is! my gorge rims at
it. Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know
not how oft. Where be your gibes now? your
gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment,
that were wont to set the table on a roar? Not one
now, to mock your own grinning? quite chap-fallen?
Now get you to my lady's chamber, and tell her, let
her paint an inch thick, to this favour she must
come; make her laugh at that.

aww i get my own petition against me? awesome!!!

dude, just drop it. if you don't like me, thats cool, but nobody except you cares. thats pretty evident by the way you are talking to yourself alone in here...just let it die man.

and for the last time, stop saying i said 'everybody hates americans' out of nowhere, like i just wanted to stir some shit up. it was a smartass reply to something extremely similar said by somebody else. and that somebody was not you. and you didn't seem to mind his post, which was 1 word different from mine (i replaced 'russians' with 'everybody') if you still can't handle it, go cry alone in a corner or something, everybody is tired of hearing about it, including msyelf.

if it is any consolation to you, i think people will not in the future be biased against you because you are american. now we can all dislike you because you are whiny, ignorant and a good old fashioned all around douchebag.

so, to summarize, get fucked.

your pal, JD

lol.

It's true. Dead and lost.

But glad not forgotten yet. Nor clogging some bung hole.

Ah JD not a wise move, my tot.

This is a room for adults. You need to learn manners before I'll speak to you again.

And your case does much better when you don't defend for yourself. Your other 2 friends did a much better job.

And despite your rather large sense of your importance in this world, this thread is not about you at all. Not really. Oh that incident with you was a distraction.

But this is more about the rest of F4F. How we treat each other. How we stick up for each other.

And I 'd like to think, about pretty fundamental philosophy. Love and respect for others. Having warms hearts, good souls.

My advice to you is that you find the sweetest, most loving woman you have in your life and talk to her about what happened here. Let her teach you a few things about love, life, and people.

You see nationalism is a lousy distraction. Groups in general. Oh culture is fine to appreciate but you don't want to get carried away by some irrational need to class everyone, everything into bundles. I really wonder how you'd function if you didn't know where somebody is from. But that's all I want to think of you my lad. Not till you grow some more.

Toodles. Find that sweet girl and listen to her.

We've done some negative. Dealt with the stick. But what about the carrot?

Forget your petty complaints with other nations here. Why bring them?

Look at the people instead. Interesting. Great stories to tell. Some of them are very sexy as well.

You don't have to look at them as students, needing to have their heads filled with your philosophy, or hard luck stories. They don' t have to be the release for all your frustrations. Just enjoy them on equal terms.

I've talked about whacking the young troublemaker on his knuckles to get him to be decent. But it is not the joy of applying the ruler, forcing manners, that I am after here.

It is seeing simple respect and decency become the rule. The expectation. Instead of being content with the sneer, the brawl, or the cold shoulder.

But you have got to see yourselves as merely people to do it. You can't be subdivided into little warring groups.

But if you prefer war for its thrills. The joy of a good old fashioned humiliation. The kick into the weak man's crotch when he is down. You can create that reality here too.

It's up to you.

OK now let's deal with a practical issue. Suppose that despite the better angels of our natures, something occurs that is too juicy for you to resist. Oh you've been a good boy for the most part but the news this week about country X's foreign policy is just too much to bear. Their leader has pulled an epic lulu, not just stupid, not just hurtful, but actually a little insane. Beyond mere bungling.

How can you, a mere imperfect human, be reasonably expected to restrain yourself? After all it is rich. And an outrage that people all over the world are laughing at.

So there is the guy here from country X. Maybe you've already chatted with a little. Somebody you seem to be on reasonbly good terms with. A fellow who seems like a decent sort, who is probably not in support of his clueless leader's move this time.

So instead of letting the poor guy have some peace, you decide that it would be an excellent chance to get his reaction. Because like a little kid becoming used to unfamiliar things you have a sincere desire to understand, perhaps, how in the world this normal appearing guy could have such a bonehead for a leader. Or maybe you just want a little reassurance that he doesn't suffer from a similar delusion as his leader.

Well OK. Not what I would do. But if you must, let's think about possible wordings. After all you have several options.

Option 1: You could put on your caped crusader suit and take an approach: 'Ah, Xian, I have cornered you at last. I demand an explanation for your actions!!! How dare you take this action in the world!!! Barbarian!!! You Xians are all the same. Wrapped up in yourselves. Disdainful of the world. Now look! Look what you've done. Foul evil-doer. Justify! Justify, I challenge you. And I will use my laser lips to cut whatever pathetic excuse you form to shreds. For I am the Guardian of All That's Right. Speak! Defend if you can.'

Well I have to admit that Option 1 sounds like a lot of fun. After all, you get to play a pretty powerful role - a superhero, with a flattering outfit no doubt. But a little reflection should tell you that this is far from being fair to poor old countryman X.

That particular day he is probably considering buying a rifle and ending his accursed leader's life. But after, thankfully, resisting this destructive urge he has decided instead to log on and try to calm down a little. Wants to be reminded of the good things in life. Beautiful women. Fun times. He'll think about his approach to his leader all in good time, when he is calmer.

In his last election he was probably forced to choose between 2 or maybe 3 low grade candidates. There is a good chance he correctly picked the better of the them for his nation at that time. There is a good chance he opposed the current leader. It could very well be that he is currently actively opposing him. But far from feeling good about his leader making a move that will likely result in his loss of power after a slow, painful wait, he is probably feeling lousy about how this destructive locust of a leader is causing so much damage to his country and his people.

Far from needing a whip or a goad, if anything he needs your compassion and patience. Or silence. For once, lord, just blessed silence. lol

OK so the morally preferable Option S, the silent option, which we've assumed in the problem statement can't be taken by you given your nature and the size of the screw up, we'll set aside.

What about Option 2: Ask if he's heard about the news. (wide grin) Ask something like: "Well that is a very interesting policy. How do you feel about it? "

Ah questions. Blessed questions. If kept short and sweet they can be so much less offensive than statements and accusations. You don't get to wear a cape sadly. You don't even get to wear a judge's robes. Nope, you just appear to be sitting back, probably with a grin, in excellent humor, in control, bemused. Your heart seems to be warm. You've cloaked whatever anger you have very well. You've left yourself all kinds of options depending upon his response to your question.

Option 2 is a far better option. That can lead to satisfaction of all parties. You might understand very quickly what countryman X is feeling by his reply. Any feelings of vendetta, of reprisal, might go away. Instead of kicking the poor dog, you might actually pet him. Share some good feelings and a shared sense that while lunacy might be running rampant in X at the moment, there are still places where people have a more reasonable view of things.

I don't think I need to lay out more options. If you insist upon being some kind of ambassador for nations. Then at least be a skilled diplomat. Take a lesson from the great ones in history. They were masters of smoothness, sweet words - even if they had reptilian hearts, some of them, lol.

But I am not a skilled diplomat. I never got the training. Never got the go-ahead notice from our Foreign Service Department. So I'll try not to get involved in treaties, negotiations, public statements.

For what it's worth. The Uncaped Crusader. lol

Ahhhhh I feel good today. In good humor. Warm.

My fury has finally abated. Was feeling soooooo betrayed.

But now feeling able to be gentle again. Patient.

But not suffering in silence ever again. lol

I adore your quarters even in a good mood then don't worry Dudley

I adore your quarters even in a good mood then don't worry Dudley


Kisses little Miss Sunshine.

"Your King is a fruitcake" said Joe Wise

"Ach, don't I knoooooow eet." said Sam Simple

"If you don't like it. Then move." said Joe Wise

"But if everybody but the King's men move out, the King will always be in power." said Sam Simple, slowly scratching his head.

"Details... Details... Why do you always cross me Simple?" fumed Joe

"Please, please Joe. I'll do what you say. I'll do what you say. " stammered Simple.

"But where can I move to. Where can I go where there is a wise King?" asked Simple with an arm up, expecting a blow.

"Hmmmmm the only acceptable choice is to move to my country." said Joe thoughtfully

"My King is a loon that thinks he is a spoon. But at least we will be countrymen."

Inquisitor: So wretch. Are you ready to confess?

Peasant: For pity's sake I already have. I am a servant of that nobleman.

Inquisitor: And is he not a base, foul, ruthless lord?

Peasant: A child can see it.

Inquisitor: Vile beast, why do you serve him?

Peasant: Because he'd bleeding crucify me if I didn't.

Inquisitor: But you admit you serve an evil lord?

Peasant: (sigh) How can we get through this quickly?

Inquisitor: Very good. We will pass immediately to the punishment.

Party A's Platform Drafting Session In a Brave New World

Chairman: Ah welcome, welcome, welcome everybody. All 200 million of you. As you know this is the first time we've decided to make a platform that represents the views of everyone that casts a vote for a candidate for our party this year.

It has never been possible before to hear from each and every one of you. We can thank technology for that. Well we'd better get started. Let's do an easy one first. Good old fashion values.

I submit that Party A is for family!

Oh a question? You there. In the 1023rd row, red baseball cap (wonderful our freedoms). Please speak up.

Red baseball cap wearing person: What d'ya mean family?

Chairman: Oh you know, a mother, father, kids, and a few pets.

Red baseball cap wearing person: I don't have a wife. My parents are dead. I do have a cat.

Chairman: Ah yes, I see. hmmm so you are more like a duo than a family. Well we can strike family from the list. It might cost us Normandy but we'll do it, just for you.

Hmmm something a little easier. Ah ok, we all love our country don't we? Why don't we try:

I submit that Party A is against flag burning!

Oh, wait another question. Yes the attractive brunette in the 10,231rd row. Looking quite lovely today dear by the way.

Attractive brunette: Are you deranged!?!?! Have you taken leave of all your senses!?!?! The Genoan sand slug has become dependent on flag burning to maintain the right mix of chemicals in its fragile ecosystem. Your reckless idea would be the death of this noble species.

Chairman: The deaux you say. Hmmm well we certainly can not do that, can we? Well lets see, looks like 0 for 2. We haven't even gotten to abortion, stem cell research, or that Killo Zap Ray Gun factory that YoYoDyne wants to construct in Manitoba.

Let's take a break and consider our options.

Stolen from a Wizard of ID cartoon:

King (passing peasant in street): Hey peasant.

Peasant #1: Hail King.

King (passing another peasant in street): Yo peasant.

Peasant #2: Ho King.

King (passing another peasant in street): Hi peasant.

Peasant #3: Heya King.

King (after returning to palace): You know it's right that saying.

Minister: Which saying Highness?

King: Familiarity breeds contempt.

Minister: Oh really?

King: Yes I can't stand them.

Strangely enough I used to love America and was a real Americophile. Then I started reading this thread!

lol you miss the point.

You should dislike me, dudley_do_ride the man.

Leave America out of it.

I am not receiving a salary from the government to do this.

For better or worse it is my own idea. My countrymen all probably think I am a tool as well.

That's fine. Remember: I am an individual.

Gotta say I don't understand why some are sooooooo bothered by this thread. Other than those who like to throw punches at America.

Frankly I probably don't want to know. I can't imagine any valid reason for offense.

Some thugs have had pretty free reign around here. I open my mouth, in a fury it is true, but maybe you should understand that fury. See it from my point of view.

This forum has made a bad thing worse. I used to be able to leave a room that was especially obnoxious. I'd figure, model's room, fine, let her promote bigotry.

But not a public forum. Sorry. You clowns clean up act and behave nicely, in a civilized way

There are no 3rd class citizen here. Not even greys to kick around.

Dont understand the thread but think you are madder than a barrel full of monkeys that have been drinking absinthe at times Dudley.

Dont understand the thread but think you are madder than a barrel full of monkeys that have been drinking absinthe at times Dudley.


insane or furious.

Or do I want to know?

Actually both are useful at times. heh heh .

I used to be able to leave a room that was especially obnoxious. I'd figure, model's room, fine, let her promote bigotry.


For those who have seen me here for years and seen me ignore such things repeatedly. Now you know why.

I haven't had some disturbing illness that recently has given me spine or some other such nonsense, it is simply that for better or worse I followed the precept of 'the model dictates'.

If my countrymen think I owe them an apology for waiting until now. ( lol I doubt they do) I'll just say it was a self-serving, political decision I made. So view me as a dark, tainted soul or possibly (shudder) as understanding some diplomacy. heh heh.

Public forum. New era.

If you liked the fun loving guy with the jokes and big chin. Well, maybe you should understand that he is a man like any other. He has a country. He owes her some duties. He is attached to his people even if he is alienated from them in many ways. Loyal if not always proud of her.

Men are more complicated than cartoons. There is a time for peace. There is a time for war.

I like ya Duds! You are passionate and won't back out of a fight, and that is no bad thing. But you have to lighten up a bit man. The comments that have riled you could have been treated just as firmly with a lighter touch and probably more effectively. God knows that forums are not the place to get the nuamces that show that a comment was meant tongue-in-cheek.

I think you are exasperating a few people though now... me included! I fundamentally agree that people should shut the fuck up when they are going to make asinine remarks which would have better been left unsaid. But you can't legislate against grown adults saying what they think. You could have challenged people on their views about why they made the comment, and probably most would have apologised or explained that they were just joking around, and that would have been the end of it. Some might have made some points about it, and you could have argued those, or got to the root cause of them. You may have cleared some up, and learnt a little about other people's perceptions and then worked on altering those.

Peace out. I ain't writing in this thread no more.