I MISS you guys! *sigh* Anyone who wants to come over and nurse me back to my normal chirpy healthy self is more than welcome. I'm kinda OVER whingeing. lol


Male nurse fantasy, huh?

Um, okay, but I'm not sure I'd look as good in the skirt as Heath Ledger's Joker did. Quote

Give me what, Saphira?



The flu, of course! I *would* give you the hot, wet, ball-draining ride of your life but I don't think I'm your type. Quote

Hahaha, I don't have a male nurse fantasy. I just like to be taken care of!

Ryan, how ARE you hunny? How are Man U doing?

Right, I shall stop hijacking Ozzie's sheep thread and go back to bed. Baaaaaaaaaaaa. Quote

Hahaha, I don't have a male nurse fantasy. I just like to be taken care of!


Right. Let's fluff up the pillows and cue up the Red Dwarf DVDs then, shall we?

Bugger. When did that "H" appear on my forehead?

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The flu, of course! I *would* give you the hot, wet, ball-draining ride of your life but I don't think I'm your type.


I dont know if you are his type or not but girls with the flu that i need take care of are my type. It is my fetish. Quote

Hahaha, I don't have a male nurse fantasy. I just like to be taken care of!
Ryan, how ARE you hunny? How are Man U doing?
Right, I shall stop hijacking Ozzie's sheep thread and go back to bed. Baaaaaaaaaaaa.


Ill be your male nurse with the developing 6pack.

And you can hijack my thread any time. Quote

Clem pulled over the car by the side of the road and showed Jed where he'd first had sex.
"It was right down there by that tree. I remember the day plainly. It was a warm summer day. She and I were so much in love. We walked down to the tree and made love for hours," Clem recalled.
"That sounds wonderful," said Jed.
"Yes. It was okay until I looked up and noticed her mother was standing right there watching us."
"Oh my God! What did her mother say when she saw you making love to her daughter?"
"Baaaaa..."


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Right. Let's fluff up the pillows and cue up the Red Dwarf DVDs then, shall we?
Bugger. When did that "H" appear on my forehead?


LMAO! You're not gonna start putting my underpants on hangers are you? Only I don't have enough (hangers, that is!).


Doggly... get back here, did I say you could stop picking up my tissues?


Ozzie; the more male nurses the better. And when I'm better we can have a massive gangbang and indulge my biggest fantasy.



Mnmissile - muaaaaah. Quote

LMAO! You're not gonna start putting my underpants on hangers are you? Only I don't have enough (hangers, that is!).
Doggly... get back here, did I say you could stop picking up my tissues?
Ozzie; the more male nurses the better. And when I'm better we can have a massive gangbang and indulge my biggest fantasy.

Mnmissile - muaaaaah.


Haveing fantasys is that sighns of getting better or worse lol.
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Ryan, how ARE you hunny? How are Man U doing?


I'm doing ok, lots of time spent studying... barely been around at all since you've been gone anyway!

United are doing soso. Not playing that great but getting some results again. Lost in the FA Cup on the weekend though but in Semi-Finals of the Champions League against Arsenal and favorites to win the league.

PS: Dimitar Berbatov is useless.

Hope you feel better and can come back soon though! I need some fun times again. Quote

Well if we are treating Saph to a Red Dwarf marathon on DVD make sure we DONT let her see the latest 3 part Back to Earth over easter here in England -- as it was 1 huge pile of sheep droppings.

If I'd of known ya been ill I would of fed-exed a couple of male nurses over to you sweetness. Quote

Well if we are treating Saph to a Red Dwarf marathon on DVD make sure we DONT let her see the latest 3 part Back to Earth over easter here in England -- as it was 1 huge pile of sheep droppings.
If I'd of known ya been ill I would of fed-exed a couple of male nurses over to you sweetness.


I saw the first part but the second and third were taken back down before I could watch them. How OLD does Rimmer look? But the girlie hologram was HAWT.

A couple of nurses Suggs? What, I'm not good enough to get the Dr himself? (You!) lol


Well I think I'm gonna drag my ass online today... I'll see how I go. Stand by with hot drinks and huggles boys!

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I'll see how I go. Stand by with hot drinks and huggles boys!


Lots and lots of huggles waiting for you here. I can allso supply lots and lots of milkie hot chockies with marshmallows.

Take care my sweet "Kissies" Quote

More jokes and fun please.

Come on guys you promised Saphira you would entertain and look after me. lol Quote

Welsh bloke walks into his bedroom where his wife is lying on the bed and
there's a blow up sheep under the bed.
He says 'Every time I want to have sex you have a headache and I have to
sleep with this!'
His wife says 'But it's a blow up sheep?'
He says 'I'm talking to the sheep!'
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The Sheep Survey


There was once a university researcher who specialised in exploring modern myths and fables. One year, in the course of her research she was expected to investigate the real prevalence of sheep shagging. Now of course, we all know that supposedly rural farmers are all starved of sex and so have to indulge in the occasional animal liason, but just how prevalent was this trend?

Our intrepid researcher set off to find out. As she went along to the first farm, she was understandably a little embarased about what she was going to have to ask the farmer there. She met him and started to chat to him about the weather, crops and suchlike. Eventually, she got her nerve together and asked: "Pardon me asking, but....have you ever shagged your sheep?"

"Arrr. I have." Was the dreaded answer.

"Err..., so how do you go about it exactly?"

"Well, it be easy really. Front legs over a gate, hold the hind legs and you're away really."

The researcher quickly made her excuses and left. She felt sure this was an isolated incident. But as she travelled around the shhep farms of the UK, she repeatedly got the answer: "Front legs over a gate, hold the hind legs and you're away."

As she was reaching the end of her study, a shocking 62% of farmers had given this answer. It was obviously a much more prevalent custom than she had previously realised. At one of the last farms she visited, she asked the dreaded question after the usual smalltalk.

"Pardon me asking, but....have you ever shagged your sheep?"

"Arrr. I have." Was the usual answer.

"So how do you go about it exactly?" (She was more confident of asking by now).

"Well, it be easy really. Front legs over your shoulders, hold the hind legs and you're away."

"Hang on a minute, all the other farmers I have spoken to have said front legs over a gate!"

"What! No kissing?"


Good Sheep

Well, a couple months back there was this trial in the West Virginia courts. A man was being tried for fornicating with a sheep, since that's illegal an' all. Anyway, the key witness was an old fella who was walking along the highway by the farm where the sheep was raised. The prosecutor asked the witness what he saw:
"Well, I was walkin' along, and saw this sheep just'a eatin' grass. And then this fella walks up from behind the sheep, real quiet-like."
"And then what?" asked the prosecutor.
"Then he unbuckled his belt, and pulled the sheep close."
"And what happened after that?"
"Well," said the witness, "they sorta shook for a couple of minutes. THEN, afterwards, the sheep turned around... an' licked him!"
Just then one of the members of the jury leaned over to the jury member next to him and said, "You know... a good sheep'll do that."


Lucky Lamb

A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a little lamb sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears, "Baaaa. 9 Iron" The man looks around and doesn't see anyone. "Baaaa. 9 Iron." He looks at the little lamb and decides to prove the lamb wrong, puts his other club away, and grabs a 9 iron. Boom! he hits it 10 inches from the cup. He is shocked. He says to the little lamb, "Wow that's amazing. You must be a lucky lamb, eh?" The little lamb reply's "Baaaa. Lucky lamb." The man decides to take the little lamb with him to the next hole. "What do you think little lamb?" the man asks. "Baaaa. 3 wood." The guy takes out a 3 wood and Boom! Hole in one. The man is befuddled and doesn't know what to say. By the end of the day, the man golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the little lamb, "OK where to next?" The little lamb replies "Baaaa. Las Vegas." They go to Las Vegas and the guy says, "OK little lamb, now what?" The lamb says, "Baaaa Roulette." Upon approaching the roulette table, the man asks," What do you think I should bet?" The little lamb replies, "Baaaa. $3000,black 6." Now, this is a million-to-one shot to win, but after the golf game, the man figures what the heck. Boom! Tons of cash comes sliding back across the table. The man takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the little lamb down and says, "Lamb, I don't know how to repay you. You've won me all this money and I am forever grateful." The little lamb replies, "Baaaa, Kiss Me." He figures why not, since after all the little lamb did for him he deserves it. With a kiss, the little lamb turns into a gorgeous 15-year-old girl. "And that, your honor, is how the girl ended up in my room."
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Missing all you guys Lickau, G-Mann, Ryan, missile and realy missing one certin person the most important of all my sweet sexie Saphira.

Hopeing i find some where soon and get settled here so i can get back and starthaving some fun. Quote

Did you hear about the daft farmer who took up sheep farming?
He failed because he planted them too close together!

Did you hear about the accountant who counted sheep in bed?
He made a mistake in the first hour, and lay awake all night trying to figure it out!

'Doctor, doctor, I can't sleep a wink.'
'Have you tried counting sheep? '
'Yes, I counted 842,511 - and then it was time to get up!'

'Doctor, doctor, I've just swallowed a sheep!'
'How do you feel? '
"Very baad!'
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A man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.
The guy doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will, instead, lay down and wallow in the grass when they are pregnant.

The Man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep. So, he loads the sheep into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the sheep and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.

The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the sheep. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the sheep are laying in the grass. "No," she says, "they're all in the truck and one of them's honking the horn."

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Just wanted to let every one know that ozzie has found a place in Melbs. hopefully ill see you all soon and be able to have fun with my verry special Saphira.
cant wait Quote