I still have 2 minutes lingering.. I can't make up my mind!!
Here's how you can make sure you have THE BEST PRIVATE . . . EVAH:
1. It's important to make an informed choice with your hard won cash. Because model choices are practically unlimited, be sure to ask lots of questions of your prospective choice. TOYS? How old is she? Where is she from? When did she first have sex? Show toys? When did she most recently have sex? How old is she? ANAL? Does she like 14" cocks? Why aren't you answering me? Show ass? Titty fuck? Toy for anal? NO ANAL?
2. Make sure the model is prepared. Ensure that your model dress exactly the way you want IN ADVANCE. You don't wanna burn up those credits watching a 14 second wardrobe change.
3. It's essential that you be aroused before going private. You don't wanna find yourself at the end of the private with an orgasm brewing and nothing naked to rub it out on. Insist that your model provide enough peeks of whatever you ask so that you can get really good and wet. What's that you say? You accidentally got off? Whoops! No worries. Happens to the best of us. Your model will be happy to help you again tomorrow.
4. Feet. Make sure your model's feet smell right, have the appropriate proportion of sole wrinklage, and a nice pedicure. Be sure to study her feet at length before pulling the trigger on your amazing private. If your model has inconsiderately dressed in stockings or hose, insist that she remove these hideous garments immediately.
5. TYPE IN ALL CAPS. IT SHOWS YOU HAVE A GRASP OF THE LATEST IN KEYBOARD TECHNOLOGY AND KNOW HOW TO TAKE COMMAND OF THE SITUATION. WOMEN LOVE THAT.
6. Talk dirty before you click that private button. Doesn't matter if what you say makes sense or if any of the words are spelled correctly. And FOR GOD'S SAKE do NOT waste time punctuating. You've gotta get your model worked up and fast! And remember, nothing says arousal like listing female body parts to someone who has female body parts.
7. Your hot talk has gotta last, because your hands are gonna be busy once that private begins wink wink. So make sure she knows you're a sexy beast.
8. Don't peak too soon. Don't get carried away with the digit dance before you launch your meat shuttle to Planet S*E*X. You might need to last OVER NINETY SECONDS.
9. At the same time, once that private starts, don't screw around with pleasantries. Get your orders in fast, and get busy on your preferred body part. But before you start peddling that perky pink puppy, position that mouse cursor over the "end show" button so you can make a quick exit after you rock her world with your orgasm. She'll appreciate your visit even if you don't say goodbye, so don't burn those precious seconds getting your keyboard all messy. She'll eventually figure out that you've left. Besides, if you can rub one out quickly enough, you might be able to thrill your your second choice model with a Very Special Visit.
10. ZOOM! CLOSER! FOR GOD'S SAKE ZOOM! You have no interest in this person's face. It'll just remind you that she's a human, and you don't wanna go there.
There you have it! Ten tips to a perfect private. Enjoy! Now go get 'em, Tiger!
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