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112609 My Day of Enlightenment
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Female Performer Chat: 112609 My Day of Enlightenment
dudley_do_ride
Created by: dudley_do_ride

11/26/09 @ 12:10pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

Yea on the dawn of this day of denial and self imposed suffering I have been visited by the incarnation of the First Tommyknocker and have achieved full enlightenment. I am one with the universe now and the universe is one with me. Peace has descended all around and through me. Many great truths have now revealed themselves to me. By about noonish, give or take, I exect to ascend to the next plane, after I cut some last ties with the material.

My transfiguration may serve as a hopeful example to all. It is a narrow path to this level of spirituality and vision but it can still be achieved even in this modern age with all its distractions. I suppose I may have some slight advantage over others in that I live in California.

Now the fun part for ascetics, namely, giving some vague clues as to the right path.

:bowdown Seek the euphoria, and the loss of self, that can be achieved in the middle of lovemaking. It is very similar to the higher state reached prior to ascension.

:bowdown :bowdown Never a borrower nor a lender be. And don't forget, stay out of debt. (This has nothing to do with enlightenment but your mom asked me to include it)

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown Transcend the cares of your immediate situation. It may help to trick yourself into thinking your problems are illusions or to buy some problem sensitive sunglasses to shade them out. Avoid too much drinking, you do need to have some brain cells left for enlightenment.

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown Adopt the "if you are about to be shot just be grateful that you are not to be hung" philosophy. Don't bother to learn its name, that's an example of an unnecessary distraction that can delay your enlightenment.

To look cool, like the guy with the eye patch in The Four Musketeers , you can roll your eyes and give a knowing, long suffering look when the firing squad misses on its first volley. And you might be able to squeeze in a quick enlightenment while they reload.

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown In the name of all that is sacred slow down on the freeway you maniacs!!! How can you know peace when veering lane to lane at 95 mph in your humvees chatting a mile a minute on your cell phones?

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown Seek out all the old video on Bob Newhart that you can find. Many suspect that he has returned from the higher plane.

And now my benediction. You are a sorry and argumentative lot at the present. *sigh* And have so many glaring manias, faults, distractions. Given the choice between a well paved superhighway heading straight to paradise and a narrow, rocky, hurricane threatened, lava covered foot path to nowhere you will rocket down the latter with your sound systems on full blast and trousers/panties down as long as you see some even remotely sexy form in front of you.

But you have greatness within you. Many will do spectacular things before they check out.
So.... continue.... :winkwink
Quote
dudley_do_ride
Created by: dudley_do_ride

11/26/09 @ 2:33pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

Having dealt with the formalties, I may now offer a rare chance for a little play by play to an ascension. I was planning to proceed in silence but some events have occurred that have made my case ... unique.

Yes, Shiva, in all his/her power and despicable humor, has pulled the old "last minute surprise drop-in relatives" trick. Apparently it was thought I required some more testing.

So mind reeling from the forbidden fumes of a great, garish feast, ears smarting from the clash of the drums and other outrageous noises of a truckload of mini-Shivas (who have grown much since our last encounter), blasts of cold from the early winter making teeth chatter and knees knock, I begin my final tasks.

11:20 Last journal entry complete

11:25 Enlightened dude ascension outfit donning procedure commencement

11:28 Boot a mini-Shiva out of my closet with some candy to give himself and his parents a test of their own bwa ha ha ha.

11:42 Outfit donning complete, with the appropriate choice of sunglasses - a specially made set of, made for show glacier glasses. Begin the enlightened dude checkout procedure as well as the smug strutting about the room procedure.

11:45 Book impromptu hotel arrangements for surprise relatives. (heh heh details of which would reveal too much about my nature)

11:48 Take a gift for Shiva out of the drawer. ( a long time selecting and performing rites over this one in the weeks and months before this final moment)

11:50 Turn off the lights. (after all we only have one planet)

11:51 *poof* ( and a little ahead of schedule I must say)





Quote
Loona
Created by: Loona

11/26/09 @ 2:54pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00

I don't get what you mean Dudley, but you are still cute :winkwink


:orglaugh


No, Dudley, no, it's not you... it's only... uh, I don't know how to say that to not hurt you... oh oh oh!

No, I have to say that, we can't live in a lie!

it's my poor dictionary, pardonner... :bowdown :bowdown
Quote
blue_cow74
Created by: blue_cow74

11/26/09 @ 3:15pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00

Dudley are you high when you write your posts ??? :smoking
Quote
dudley_do_ride
Created by: dudley_do_ride

11/26/09 @ 4:02pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294


No, I have to say that, we can't live in a lie!


Fortunately for you I have just previously used my new ability to look into the future, despite it not appearing in my timeline, and have anticipated your comment. Otherwise I would not be able to answer, since I have now ascended by this time.

A budding poetess, going by name of Britney James in this existence, has recently written a beautiful poem that may be related. Meditate on this my child and you will find some truth.

Also don't forget the answer to the riddle of one hand clapping that I entrusted to you and a few others.

And now, one last: don't let people sneak up on you while you meditate.









Quote
Kertus
Created by: kertus

11/26/09 @ 4:03pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: The Planet Piiiing
Posts: 880

huh?


Yea on the dawn of this day of denial and self imposed suffering I have been visited by the incarnation of the First Tommyknocker and have achieved full enlightenment. I am one with the universe now and the universe is one with me. Peace has descended all around and through me. Many great truths have now revealed themselves to me. By about noonish, give or take, I exect to ascend to the next plane, after I cut some last ties with the material.

My transfiguration may serve as a hopeful example to all. It is a narrow path to this level of spirituality and vision but it can still be achieved even in this modern age with all its distractions. I suppose I may have some slight advantage over others in that I live in California.

Now the fun part for ascetics, namely, giving some vague clues as to the right path.

:bowdown Seek the euphoria, and the loss of self, that can be achieved in the middle of lovemaking. It is very similar to the higher state reached prior to ascension.

:bowdown :bowdown Never a borrower nor a lender be. And don't forget, stay out of debt. (This has nothing to do with enlightenment but your mom asked me to include it)

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown Transcend the cares of your immediate situation. It may help to trick yourself into thinking your problems are illusions or to buy some problem sensitive sunglasses to shade them out. Avoid too much drinking, you do need to have some brain cells left for enlightenment.

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown Adopt the "if you are about to be shot just be grateful that you are not to be hung" philosophy. Don't bother to learn its name, that's an example of an unnecessary distraction that can delay your enlightenment.

To look cool, like the guy with the eye patch in The Four Musketeers , you can roll your eyes and give a knowing, long suffering look when the firing squad misses on its first volley. And you might be able to squeeze in a quick enlightenment while they reload.

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown In the name of all that is sacred slow down on the freeway you maniacs!!! How can you know peace when veering lane to lane at 95 mph in your humvees chatting a mile a minute on your cell phones?

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown Seek out all the old video on Bob Newhart that you can find. Many suspect that he has returned from the higher plane.

And now my benediction. You are a sorry and argumentative lot at the present. *sigh* And have so many glaring manias, faults, distractions. Given the choice between a well paved superhighway heading straight to paradise and a narrow, rocky, hurricane threatened, lava covered foot path to nowhere you will rocket down the latter with your sound systems on full blast and trousers/panties down as long as you see some even remotely sexy form in front of you.

But you have greatness within you. Many will do spectacular things before they check out.
So.... continue.... :winkwink



Quote
dudley_do_ride
Created by: dudley_do_ride

11/26/09 @ 4:12pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

Dudley are you high when you write your posts ??? :smoking


How now blue_cow74...

Once again I have used the look ahead trick that I have previously explained and will not again.

The only substance I consume during the creation and capture of my visions is skim milk. I was disappointed to find, shortly before arrival of my relatives, that one gallon container I just bought yesterday was spoiled despite the expiration date checking out. I suspect that this was another ploy by Shiva to ruffle my calm. Too many unexplained coincidences converging at the same point in time and space.

Good luck be with you all the days of your journey through this land. :)
Quote
Kertus
Created by: kertus

11/26/09 @ 4:17pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: The Planet Piiiing
Posts: 880

this is wunderful stuff!



How now blue_cow74...

Once again I have used the look ahead trick that I have previously explained and will not again.

The only substance I consume during the creation and capture of my visions is skim milk. I was disappointed to find, shortly before arrival of my relatives, that one gallon container I just bought yesterday was spoiled despite the expiration date checking out. I suspect that this was another ploy by Shiva to ruffle my calm. Too many unexplained coincidences converging at the same point in time and space.

Good luck be with you all the days of your journey through this land. :)



Quote
dudley_do_ride
Created by: dudley_do_ride

11/26/09 @ 7:30pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

Yea on the dawn of this day of denial and self imposed suffering I have been visited by the incarnation of the First Tommyknocker and have achieved full enlightenment. I am one with the universe now and the universe is one with me. Peace has descended all around and through me. Many great truths have now revealed themselves to me. By about noonish, give or take, I exect to ascend to the next plane, after I cut some last ties with the material.

My transfiguration may serve as a hopeful example to all. It is a narrow path to this level of spirituality and vision but it can still be achieved even in this modern age with all its distractions. I suppose I may have some slight advantage over others in that I live in California.

Now the fun part for ascetics, namely, giving some vague clues as to the right path.

:bowdown Seek the euphoria, and the loss of self, that can be achieved in the middle of lovemaking. It is very similar to the higher state reached prior to ascension.

:bowdown :bowdown Never a borrower nor a lender be. And don't forget, stay out of debt. (This has nothing to do with enlightenment but your mom asked me to include it)

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown Transcend the cares of your immediate situation. It may help to trick yourself into thinking your problems are illusions or to buy some problem sensitive sunglasses to shade them out. Avoid too much drinking, you do need to have some brain cells left for enlightenment.

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown Adopt the "if you are about to be shot just be grateful that you are not to be hung" philosophy. Don't bother to learn its name, that's an example of an unnecessary distraction that can delay your enlightenment.

To look cool, like the guy with the eye patch in The Four Musketeers , you can roll your eyes and give a knowing, long suffering look when the firing squad misses on its first volley. And you might be able to squeeze in a quick enlightenment while they reload.

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown In the name of all that is sacred slow down on the freeway you maniacs!!! How can you know peace when veering lane to lane at 95 mph in your humvees chatting a mile a minute on your cell phones?

:bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown :bowdown Seek out all the old video on Bob Newhart that you can find. Many suspect that he has returned from the higher plane.


Dudes check out my bowdown triangle. Right triangle. 6 x 6 yet the hyponenuse is 6.

Told ya I was enlightened. I can manipulate the laws of geometry (this message was written at 10:30)
Quote
Penney Z
Created by: Penney Z

11/26/09 @ 8:35pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00

Maybe spending too much time with radars does it :orglaugh
Quote
dudley_do_ride
Created by: dudley_do_ride

11/26/09 @ 8:57pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

Maybe spending too much time with radars does it :orglaugh


Hey Penny ; )

How's life treating you?

heh heh I saw your thoughts re: Athos, Milady, and ...

As you can see time is moving in an odd way in this thread. But whattaya gonna do? Can't com-plane :orglaugh
Quote
skillz_set
Created by: skillz_set

11/26/09 @ 11:23pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00

"WHAT YOU TALKING BOUT, DUDLEY?"
Quote
dudley_do_ride
Created by: dudley_do_ride

11/27/09 @ 1:04am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

Whew, awright, made it through without some smartass grilling me about Hindu deities. I know more about the Tommyknockers, though it's been a while since I've thought about them. (the little troublemakers, godsends or aliens depending upon your POV)

Seems like a good ending to this day and this thread. Hope it was weird enough for you.

Have a happy holidays : )

And those of you in colder parts of the world, up north, well ... I can't really feel your pain but I promise I'll play around with the ice cubes in my drink to give me some feeling.
Quote
skillz_set
Created by: skillz_set

11/27/09 @ 3:50pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00

Dudley have you lost your damn Mind ! :mad
Quote
dudley_do_ride
Created by: dudley_do_ride

11/27/09 @ 4:26pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

Dudley have you lost your damn Mind ! :mad


Dudley is gone now. All they found were his tennis shoes (Shiva has a thing about his/her carpets I guess)

We thank you all for playing and to all a good night.

Quote
Loona
Created by: Loona

11/27/09 @ 4:38pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00



Dudley is gone now. All they found were his tennis shoes (Shiva has a thing about his/her carpets I guess)

We thank you all for playing and to all a good night.





No, dear. We haven't finished yet. Before you leave - please explain me what that Shiva does have - what I don't?... those four hands are soooooo entertaining for you?... grrrrrr...

:orglaugh
Quote
beach2010
Created by: beach2010

11/27/09 @ 4:58pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: under the covers
Posts: 14

[Sanskrit śivaḥ, from śiva-, auspicious, dear.]

(noun)
Hinduism
One of the principal Hindu deities, worshiped as the destroyer and restorer of worlds and in numerous other forms. Shiva is often conceived as a member of the triad also including Brahma and Vishnu.
(derivatives)
Quote
Loona
Created by: Loona

11/27/09 @ 5:06pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00

[Sanskrit ¶ivaḥ, from ¶iva-, auspicious, dear.]

(noun)
Hinduism
One of the principal Hindu deities, worshiped as the destroyer and restorer of worlds and in numerous other forms. Shiva is often conceived as a member of the triad also including Brahma and Vishnu.
(derivatives)




I bet she loves her only for her four hands... Why I have only two?... *crying* *raising hands to the sky*
Quote
dudley_do_ride
Created by: dudley_do_ride

11/27/09 @ 5:18pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294


No, dear. We haven't finished yet. Before you leave - please explain me what that Shiva does have - what I don't?... those four hands are soooooo entertaining for you?... grrrrrr...
:orglaugh


From a monk at the gates of DoRide hermitage:

"Before he ascended, Brother Ride left words of comfort and guidance that I am allowed to select from in explaining to the general public the ramifications of this great transformation.

By denying the power of the material world, resisting the temptations of the gods themselves, it is possible to unleash and master great forces. It is also possible to acquire much useful knowledge.

To move from simple enjoyment of life and on to the fulfillment of lofty dreams is a natural progression in the life of a mountie."

The First Tommyknocker also left a note, it reads simply "You will all become someday. It is your deeeeeeeeeestiny." (yeah he drags his 'e's when he writes.)


Quote
_-Sweet
Created by: _-sweet

11/27/09 @ 5:22pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Netherland

I bet she loves her only for her four hands... Why I have only two?... *crying* *raising hands to the sky*



Don't worry Angel those two hands work miracles for me ;)
Quote
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